Wow it’s been a while

I hadn’t realized how long it’s been since I’ve posted till just now.  So thought I’d get on here & announce that *laughs* I am still around just been doing a bit more this summer than usual, & been on World of Warcraft a lot since Legion came out a few weeks ago.  And honestly just haven’t had much to talk about as I’ve just been kind of existing over the last few months more than anything else.  But summer was good overall & my weight hasn’t gone up so yays for that too.  Hope that everyone is doing good too since I’ve only commented a few times on the blogs I follow but promise I still read them.

As well as spending some time with my kid actually doing a couple of things this summer, as I said have been on WoW a lot…SecondLife not so much…& have been sort of playing with Snapchat & Dubsmash tho since I have like no friends on Snapchat haven’t really done much at all with it since *laughs* you can only take pictures for your own amusement so many times.  And right now am also trying to catch up on a few TV shows I got behind on before they start for the season or before I get too far behind on them for this season.    So thanks to everyone & hugs all around & will talk to everyone soon…sooner than the last time for sure I hope!

First TMI Tuesday in a while


1. What TV show do you love to watch but are a little embarrassed to tell friends that you simply cannot miss an episode.

It’s an older 1 but I’ve been binge watching True Blood & Hemlock Grove & I’ll be the first to admit it’s kind of embarrassing since for the longest time I hated them both. *laughs*

2. What website and/or magazine do you read and it’s your guilty pleasure?

Cracked & Buzzfeed & WatchMojo lol

3. What is the grocery store item you buy but you know you should not?


4. Tell us about something you do at work that you would not want your co-workers to know that you do.

Honestly can’t think of anything.  I usually sit out in the truck & read while I wait to go in but they all know that. lol

5. Do you have a secret stash? What is it?

I do but it’s not for me…I keep extra cat food for the cat just in case she runs out & or a can gets busted or something.

Bonus: What is your most embarrassing guilty pleasure?

The fact that I have to have a stuffie on the table beside the bed every night even if I don’t sleep with it *laughs*

Just a quick couple of things…

I just checked my WordPress Dashboard & realized that yesterday was my 6 yr anniversary of having joined WP.  I haven’t been blogging the whole time & haven’t been on this 1 the whole time but it still made me chuckle & feels like an awesome thing.

6 Year Anniversary Achievement
Happy Anniversary with!
You registered on 6 years ago.
Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging.


I had started to post that earlier but got sidetracked, & just ran into this on Facebook & wanted to share it.  It will make you cry but only cause there’s so many feels.  It’s also why I am almost 44 & am not ashamed of being a fangirl…because some celebrities are awesome people & do everything they can to make the world a better place & are so much more than their money & fame.  I know not all of them are that way but it brightens my day when they are & to reminded there are still so many good people in the world.  Bless the both of them as well as all of you.

Ryan R: Actor Writes Tribute to 13-Year-Old Fan Who Died From Cancer


Hey there

It’s me again!  *laughs* I’ve been meaning to post here but seems every time I think of something I’m where I can’t right the idea down & I forget it before I’m able to put it down on here.  Tho I would like to ask an opinion from anyone who’s willing to help.  I know this blog has gone so many directions since the beginning since things have changed so much in my life since then, but I would like to be a bit more regular even if it’s just a weekly inspirational picture & a few comments…just to show I am still here & am still interested just kind of still trying to figure out a direction if any.  So if anyone has any opinions or anything ideas or such I’d love to hear them & even if not, still thank you all for being there thru so long & for the people I’ve met & comment with…all of you mean the world to me so thank you & don’t forget you have made a difference for at least one person!  Huggies to everyone!

Wow…it’s been a while

I hadn’t realized how long it had been since I was on here & I do want to say I am sorry.  I’ve been working thru things in my head…concentrating super hard on sticking to the weight loss that everything else has kind of fallen to the wayside.  But I am still here & hopefully will be doing more as it gets prettier out & I get in a better place to do more so hugs everyone & have a good rest of the week & a good weekend as well!  And here’s some thoughts that’ve helped me a lot in the last few weeks so wanted to share them. *smiles*





Why? Another rant

Why do people have to shit on you & everything you believe in?  I know a lot of it is my fault for letting it bother me but sometimes things just get thru the chinks in my armor & make me feel like the most ignorant person on the planet.  When you’re reduced to sitting in the bathroom at work crying cause you’ve been smacked 3 times in 1 day & just cannot hold it together any longer because I’ve not felt like the scared no esteem teenager I was so long ago in quite awhile…well it just sucks shit.  And feeling like no 1 gives a shit just makes it worse.  Anyway…rant over & thanks for listening.

Yays random!

Just sitting here listening to music…ranging from One Direction to AC/DC to Beethoven & now Tainted love *laughs*…& was thinking.  I really truly do believe in love, & that makes everything so much more confusing because even tho I really do believe in it, every time I think I might have found out I get gut punched.  I know everyone has those issues, but it’s still crap.  There should be a clearer, easier way to tell, if only to save so much pain & heartbreak.  I try telling myself that since I’ve gone thru so many tries that when I do find it it’ll be awesome & amazing even if I have to work my ass off to keep it, but lately…it has been so hard to hold on to at least a tiny bit of hope since I’ve lost most of it.  I’m so tired of the liars & cheaters & even worse the ones who love you for what you can give them & how they make you feel instead of what & who you really are, or the ones who don’t necessarily lie but hold back on things…big things…they know would make all the difference in the relationship…for the good or the bad.  I’m tired of fake people & shallow people & selfish people & people who act like their selfless but can’t think beyond themselves…I’m just so tired of so much of it.  As I told a friend the other day, I’m as low as I can get because for me, self harm (except my emotional eating) has never even been an issue or question because that is never been something I’ve wanted to do or felt like I had to do to make myself better, but right now…I’m not much above that I’ll admit.  Most of the time it’s like being in a dark, damp, misty forest where the mist is so think it’s like a blanket & all I want to do is hide there forever.  But I’ve been concentrating on my weight & eating so hoping that will pull me out some since my normal standby just isn’t going to happen…every time I try to write all I can do is stare at the blank page & hate whatever’s giving me such terrible writer’s block.

Anyway, just needed to vent & rant again so huggies to all & thanks for your support even if it’s just as a like or comment or visiting & reading & hope you have an awesome weekend!

Workout motivator? *giggles*

I was looking on my SparkPeople page this morning & found this & *laughs* had to share.  Cause I know even if it’s camera tricks & people tricks, it made me giggle so of course I had to share!

Hugs to all & hope you’re having a great weekend…& a special thanks to those who commented on my rant a couple of weeks back…it meant the world to me!

Random rant about me & weight loss

I just had to get this out of my system & knew if I put it here, it’d do the most good.

My question is…what kind of fucking person has to pull over on the side of the road & cry because she has to eat home cooked food, instead of being able to get pizza & hot wings?  I think I’ve hit rock bottom & I’m not sure how the hell to get past it because right now…all the trying & effort & monitoring what I eat & trying to exercise…it just makes me more & more depressed every single time I have to do it.  I mean when  a big portion of your brain would rather just not eat since it can’t have what it wants…even tho it knows how bad what it wants is…how the hell do you get past that or work with it?  I’m tired of the frustration & disgust & irritation & some days just want to face dive into every bad thing I can think of & say fuck it all at least I’ll die happy…even tho I know I won’t because I’ll be physically miserable.  But this way I’m mentally & emotionally worn down & miserable so I’m damned if I do & damned if I don’t.  I’m either disgusted & hate everything, or physically miserable because I hurt & can’t breathe & can’t move.

Anyway…I think I’m done so thanks for listening anyone who bothers to read this & hugs to all of you for sticking with me thru everything.