30 Day Blog Challenge Day 2

Today’s question: 2. How have you changed in the past 2 years?

Wow…that could take pages to sum up but I think I’ll try to keep it as simple as I can.  *laughs* Save everyone a bit of strain on their eyes.  And I think I’ll separate it into parts to make it easier for me to not repeat anything.

Well I ended up going back onto Secondlife after swearing up & down I wasn’t going to do it because of all the heartache & problems I had that caused me to leave in the first place.  But, my best friend convinced me to get on & play Greedy with her, so I did.  And this 1 evening not long after I came back, she was off with a friend of hers so I decided to take 1 of my alts exploring & playing with RLV & traps & went to this place that sounded good.  Realized after I got there that I’d actually been there with another friend a week or 2 before, so decided to explore a bit.  Ended up getting greeted then IMed by this man & I still to this day don’t know how or why but…that was the first time I could ever remember feeling like I wanted to get down on my knees & please him any way possible…& that after only a few minutes of chat.  After that night, I did some online research & realized that instead of being dominant like I’d assumed I was my whole life, with a certain few men I was the complete opposite…& very submissive.  Which I’ll admit did explain why the few times I had tried to play Domme, I had sucked so badly at it.  I’ve met a few people since & have talked to them & they’ve helped reinforce my thoughts there….that I am submissive at the very least & maybe even a type of baby girl…tho that still remains to be seen.

I have also managed to lose weight after being diagnosed with extreme high blood pressure & edema…so even tho I have to wear compression stockings for the rest of my life I have also lost almost 30 lbs & have managed to keep it off for 4 months…which is still better than gaining it back. It’s also had an interesting side effect because my picky child has been willing to eat foods he’s never been willing to try before because he knows how much trouble I’m having & that I’m having to redo my eating so I can lose the weight & feel better & not be sick…& he’s old enough to see the difference between now & then & know it’s because of the weight & be willing to try things just to make it easier on me.  So I’ve been trying quite a few new things with my kid’s support which is always an awesome thing.

Also thanks to my kid, I have started raiding in WoW.  I never ever could’ve imagined me doing it before this expansion, even tho I did say that if Garrosh was the final boss I’d learn how to raid just to kill him. *laughs*.  Instead, I’ve been playing alot with my kid & he has been willing to hold my hand & coach me thru heroic dungeons, help me kill stuff on Timeless Isle, & help me thru the fights in the raids the first time so I wasn’t a total idiot & get myself killed on the first try.  He’s even gone so far as to point out I’m his mom in groups if they give me crap so at least I know I’m not a total embarrassment.  And playing on there with him I have made a huge improvement in my playing.  I was even able to beat him at a fair duel a few times which I never would’ve imagined that happening since I suck at PVP & in my opinion he’s really good at it…till he get frustrated at least.  So thanks to him, I’m doing so much better at WoW than I ever would’ve guessed before this expansion came out & have only got to beat Garrosh himself so something for me to look forward to.

I know there’s more but those are probably the biggest changes.  Thanks for listening as always everyone!

30 Day Blog Challenge Day 1

Since TMI Tuesday didn’t strike a chord with me today & I’ve been lousy at posting anyway…I found some 30 Day Blog challenges online in various places so I just did it my way…mixed & matched a few of them together.  Will be doing this over the next 30 days so hopefully I won’t mess up & miss a day.  Give me a reason to blog more & who knows someone might get something out of it…if only a chuckle per day!  And if anyone has an suggestions on another 1 for me to do after this, please feel free to leave a comment about it. *smiles*  So here goes the first post.

1. Weird things you do when you’re alone.

I’ve thought about this alot & honestly can’t come up with that many because well *laughs* according to some people I’m weird anyway so…I guess something i do when I’m sitting here by myself that most people probably don’t do is I sing Crazy by Patsy Cline just to watch my youngest cat nearly break her neck running in here to love on me since for someone insane reason that song seems to be her mating call.  I don’t understand it at all but it’s just as funny every single time I do it to watch her reaction…plus getting kitty lovings is always good too. *grins*

Time for a rant

Yeah…I know…barely say anything for months & now here I go on a rant.  But I need this & where better to put this than on my blog?

I have in the last month or so, been looking again for a Dom.  Well…so far…not a whole lot of luck.  I’ve met some very nice men but…sadly enough they’ve been too nice or just…nothing at all clicked there.  They were sweet & kind & polite & since I am so far from polite…as well as blunt & admittedly can have a bit of an attitude…I wasn’t about to try it when both us of would’ve had to change too much of who we are to make it work.  The rest…*shakes head* I am just so fed up with as I told a friend of mine the other night who honestly has possibilities if I didn’t screw myself totally that night…I’m to the point where I’m just going to give up on men totally again because I just can’t take much more of this bullshit.

What I want to know is…why can’t these men bother to read or if they do…why does it not sink in?  Or are they just so sure of themselves & their sexual awesomeness that they ignore what you plainly state in your profile & within the first few minutes of chatting…& go for the sexual side of things right off?  If I was just looking for a man to order me around sexually they’re a dime a dozen & I sure wouldn’t warn them away…if…that was what I was wanting.  I’m beginning to think what I feel like I need…either doesn’t exist or else I can’t have.  I need someone who is much more interested in my mind & my creativeness & how they can use it & mold it to be what they know I can be & something to stimulate them & make them proud to have me.  If I found that…the sexual side of things would fall naturally into place because I’d be begging them…not having them tell me to beg them.

I don’t know if I’m being stubborn or difficult or just unlucky but I want to know someone before I submit to them…get naked & let them direct me or me write them naughty IMs or emails.  And I’ll be the first to admit that my submissive needs probably put me on the more high maintenance side of things…but it’s how I am & i’m not going to accept less even if it means being single for another 20 yrs.  I’m also don’t quite fit as what alot of men seem to think is a submissive tho honestly I think they see sub & think slave whether it’s right or not.  And after talking to alot of other women & reading alot, I’m having to wonder if I don’t have a part of me that’s a little or babygirl.  Which means…& I am very aware of this…that I can be 1 heck of a handful & it takes a very dedicated & patient man to deal with me.  I know this…which is why I get so irritated at the ones who think that it’s all about sex when for me…my submission is so much more & so far beyond sex that to equate it with that…is to cheapen it & me in the process.  Tho the other day, as i was talking to someone the other day…I have come to a conclusion about some things I need from a Dominant.

  1. I need someone who values & encourages my opinions, but can not only tell me when he thinks I’m wrong, but is willing to explain why & give an alternative to it in a way that it makes sense to me.
  2. I need someone who doesn’t mind my switch from naughty sub to spoiled princess since I can often go from being seductive to giggling & poking someone in the blink of an eye.  Thanks to my former Master I am more comfortable with my own sexualess than I ever could have imagined being…but there’s still that brat little kid side of me that comes out more as I get more comfortable with someone.
  3. I need someone who will encourage my creativity & intelligence & help me become even more than I ever thought possible.  Someone to help me not only set goals, but guide me & give me ways to accomplish them, & be proud & show me that every step of the way.
  4. I need lots of encouragement…for everything.  But when I get it…the sun will rise & set on the man who gives it to me.  Someone who can give that part of themselves to me…I will gladly give as much of me as possible in return because he deserves it.
  5. I need someone who isn’t insulted or feels slighted because most of my weekends & evenings go to spending time with my kid & just goofing off.  I’m an adult women & I can find time to incorporate someone into my life…as long as they’re willing to have patience while I’m working out the kinks on things.
  6. I have health issues…most from my weight…& since I’m losing weight these will hopefully become less & less.  Don’t get mad at me because I can’t do such & such & don’t try to take over my diet & tell me what to eat.  Encourage me…give me ideas & suggestions to help but don’t be mad if I don’t take them as I’ve lost 30 lbs…I must be doing something right.
  7.   I respond much better all around to encouragement than punishment so it’s the easier & better way to go.  Failing to please my dominant is usually more than enough punishment itself.  And here is another case where it crosses over because the punishments that work the best…seem to be little or baby girl related such as writing something 100 times, having to say what I did wrong so many times, to stand in the corner…those types of things do alot more for me than anything else I’ve found.
  8. I guess the biggest thing is…I need someone to encourage me & guide me & who doesn’t judge me & will just let me be myself…whether that be the naughty side or the silly kid side & will value both sides equally & be proud of the woman who is his in every way.

I know this was kind of random but it honestly fits no matter what kind of relationship I am in.  If anyone has any pointers or opinions I’d love to hear them & thank you so much for letting me get this off my chest.  *huggies* to everyone!

TMI Tuesday & not an April Fool’s Day joke in it

Many of us cannot live with out computer technology and being “connected” in some manner. Computers are a huge part of our lives and thus many of us personalize our computers, smartphones, tablets, etc. to show our personalities or to be extensions of our uniqueness. This week’s TMI Tuesday is about the love affair we have with our computer devices or Computer Love.

COMPUTER LOVE TMI ART

1. What’s the wallpaper (photo, design, etc) on your phone, laptop or PC? Is it the same or different on these devices?

Different on my phone, desktop & laptop.  Right now on my desktop it’s a picture of the backside of a rat & says “I’m all out of fucks to give…but here’s a rat’s ass.”  My phone it’s my eldest cat…my baby, & on the laptop I think my son has 1 of his WoW pictures on it.

2. What’s on the desktop of your phone or notebook/tablet (i.e., icons, files, windows etc.)?

A few shortcut/icons but that’s it…weather, clock, messages, camera, gallery & I think that’s all

3. What type of computer device do you use most often?

My desktop

4. How many computer type devices do you own including smartphones?

3

5. Do you make sexy videos with your smartphone?

*laughs* Nope..don’t have anyone to make sexy videos for anyway

6. Do you video-chat naked or have virtual sex using your computer?

I have in the past with my ex-boyfriend but don’t make a habit of it.

7. How many naked photos of your whole body or your body parts have you taken with your smartphone camera?

Um…I haven’t exactly kept count…bad enough to admit I have done it *laughs & blushes*

8. What is the most photographed part of your body?

My finger cause I love giving it to people when they takes pictures of me.

Bonus:  Post a photo of the most photographed part of your body.

Sure…I’d love to share…enjoy *laughs*

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Bonus, Bonus: Do you use a screensaver? If yes, post a pic of it.

It’s just random pictures I have on my computer so anything that catches my eye goes into that folder.

Bbm5OHCCUAEonMr

TMI Tuesday & sorry so long

I apologize to everyone…real life & my own head have had me kind of kidnapped so haven’t been on here much.  Hopefully that’ll change soon & thanks to everyone who has stuck by me! *smiles*  Now on to the TMI!

 

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Wouldn’t life be more interesting if it was punctuated by background music in certain situations? Yes of course it would!

Below I have given you the situation, you name the background music that should play. Have fun, it’s the soundtrack of your life.

1. When you wake up in the morning.   What the Hell by Avril Lavigne cause that’s usually how I feel *laughs*

2. When you climax during sex.    Mz Hyde by Halestorm *laughs*

3. When you urinate.   Twinkle Twinkle little Star cause my mom used to sing Tinkle Tinkle little star when she went to the bathroom…or I’ve gotta go pee…sung to I’ve gotta be me. lol

4. When you walk into your home after a long day of work.    I Wanna Be Sedated by The Offspring *laughs*

5. When you take the first sip of your favorite beverage.    The old Coca Cola theme since it’s Caffeine Free Diet Coke…close enough for me *laughs*

Bonus: When you are reprimanding your kids or yelling at your significant other.  These Boots are Made for Walking by Geri Halliwell *laughs*

Bonus, Bonus: When you are having sexual relations.  I Wanna Touch You There by Sarah Connor

And there we go for the week…thanks again to everyone!

TMI Tuesday…better late than never lol

Today’s TMI Tuesday I’m Just Askin’ …

just askin tmi feb 25

1. We are just a few months into 2014 but I want to know what have you done this year that you have never done before?

Do a LFR raid in WoW & not get booted or called a noob or huntard.

2. You are going to a deserted island, your only entertainment will be to read. What five (5) books will you take with you?

The Devil’s Cat by William Johnstone, The Lake by R. Karl Largent, The Rats by James Herbert, the newest Anita Blake novel by Laurell K Hamilton cause I haven’t gotten to read it yet, & Midnight Bandit by Marlene Suson *laughs*

3. We all change and grow over time (at least you should). What two (2) things do you miss about the old you? Why?

I honestly can’t think of anything…tho maybe I do miss not being quite so scared of people.  Other than that…I like me now more than I’ve liked present time me in a long time & don’t worry about the old me as much as I used to.

4. How would you define and calculate ‘sexual satisfaction’?

*laughs* I’d have to have something sexual in my life to be able to define that now wouldn’t I? *grins*

5. Porn–Has it ever been good for your relationship? Has it ever been bad for your relationship?

Have never had porn in a relationship so can’t say.

Bonus: Is there a secret you’d like to share? What is it?

I had biscuit pizzas for supper tonight…& I loved them *grins*

Have a good week everyone!!

TMI Tuesday for the week

TMI Tuesday Game Show Edition

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1. The Price is Right:

What is the right price to make you have sex with a total stranger?

I guess I might go for it if I got $5 million or more after taxes.  *laughs* if worse comes to worst I can close my eyes & pretend it’s whoever I wish it would be. *grins*

2. Make Me Laugh:

What part of your naked body when touched, makes you laugh?

Every part cause I feel so self-conscious I giggle when I’m naked *grins*

3. Family Feud:

What act could you do or thing could you say that would really upset your significant other?

I don’t have 1 so I don’t know but all I have to do is say the word penis around my son & he’ll plug his ears & tell me to stop saying that. *laughs*

4. Supermarket Sweep:

You’ve been set free in a sex toy market that includes small items (e.g. condoms, vibrators) to large items (e.g. Sybians, spanking benches) and everything in between. What 5 items will you put in your shopping cart?

The 5 most expensive in the store so I can resell them on ebay *grins big*

5. The Dating Game (Blind Date, UK version; Perfect Match, Australian version).
For fun click HERE to see the crazy fashion of the bachelorette, plus actor John Ritter is one of the bachelors.

Part I – There are 3 contestants to which you will pose your questions. Will your contestants be of your opposite sex, your same sex, or a mix?
Part II – What are 3 questions you would ask the contestants?

They would be a mix as long as it was 2 men & 1 woman…& she was someone who met my criteria since I’m kind of picky about women.  And then for part 2…questions…hmm…this is the hard part. *laughs* Ok…1. If you were the last of your sex on earth…what 1 quality would you want of the last member of the opposite sex to have so you could repopulate the planet?  2. If you could be on any TV show new or old, what would it be & what would your character be? 3. What would the worst date you can imagine going on be like?

Bonus: TMI Tuesday Cash Cab (several International versions) – Unsuspecting taxi passengers hail a cab and suddenly find themselves on a TV game show. While on the cab ride you must do specific acts ordered by your cab driver in order to win cash and get the full free cab ride to your destination.

The TMI Taxi has just picked you up. How much cash will you win? At which level will you stop the cab, end the ride, and be dumped at the curb?

Level 1: Flash passers-by either by lifting your shirt or mooning them – $20 (all cash prize amounts are USD)
Level 2: Dry hump another passenger in the cab with you (remember the camera is recording) – $50
Level 3: French kiss the cab driver for 1 minute – $75
Level 4: Have sex, in the cab, with the other passenger who is a complete stranger and…
- if you are gay/lesbian the stranger is heterosexual
- if you are heterosexual the stranger is your same sex
- if you are bisexual you are just having fun *wink*

Cash prize $1000

I could do the 1st 2 without even thinking about it…would think it was hilarious to do in fact.  Level 3 depended on the cab driver & 4…I’d have to say no to just because I wouldn’t want the only time I have sex with a woman to be in a cramped up backseat of a moving vehicle…if I was going to do it I’d want to be able to make it count. *chuckles*

And there is my TMI for the week…hope you enjoy your week!

The last few days

The last few days have actually turned out to be pretty good…at least from my point of view.  Well ok today sucked but…the few days before have gone pretty well.  Over the weekend I admittedly played alot of WoW.  But I did finally got the mail helm from the Timeless Isle I needed to use my Burden of Eternity on & now my main has a 535 ilevel so I’m a happy camper.  Plus the other character I’ve been working on alot, my shadow priest, well I leveled her up 8 levels in about 4 days.  I also decided to go & heal a few dungeons…even tho I hadn’t healed since I was a level 30. *laughs*  Much to my surprise, after my kid filled in the spells I’d gotten since then, I ended up doing quite well.  To my surprise, me & 2 other DPS ended up 3 manning Gun’drak after our tank & healer left.  I went healer & the 2 of them tanked & we did all but the very first boss with just the 3 of us…& no deaths.  And we were level 74-77 so we were all right on level.  Needless to say that made my day in so many ways.

3ManningGundrak

 

Then I got to get the holiday kitties on SecondLife & even had enough money to get a matching pair of 1 of the types for my best friend.  And I got to spend quite a bit of time with my former Master on there…something I’ve not gotten to do in forever, & am glad I did because I needed that right then.  More than even I realized till afterwards.  Plus, I moved plots on there & like the new 1 so much better because *laughs* now my KittyCats don’t hide in the grass anymore.

I’ve also now lost over 30 lbs on my diet so that was a good thing too.  We were out of school a few days last week because of the snow & ice but me & my kid just did our own things…playing some together on WoW & generally laughing at each other when we weren’t.  So all in all…the last few days…until today…have been better than things have been in a while…which I am most definitely thankful for.

 

 

Tuesday TMI

First 1 for February

state_of_being

1. What is going well with your life?  I like my job & the people I work with for the most part & losing weight is going good…if slow *laughs*

2. What is going well with your sex life?  Um…what’s 1 of those cause I can’t quite remember? *laughs*

3. What do you want in your life that you currently do not have?  A special relationship with an adult of the opposite sex…oh & a collar *grins & laughs*

4. Are you happy or grumpy when you wake in the morning?  Depends on whether my cat is sitting on my head or not cause furry cat butt in your face does not make for a happy wakeup

5. What attracted you to your first crush?  I have no clue.  But I do know for years I wanted to marry Harrison Ford & wanted to be an archaeologist *laughs*

6. What attracted you to your current crush/lover/significant other? Um…i don’t have 1 so can’t quite answer that…boring I know but meh that’s life *grins*

Bonus: What would you do if you had one day left to live?  Make my kid go to Ryan’s with me & eat till we couldn’t eat no more than come home & watch movies with him & do 1 last raid on WoW with him before sending who deserves 1 a final email just for them…& lots of kitty kisses.

I’m thankful for…

This may not be the time of year that most people are thankful but tonight, I’m thankful that I have the awesome friends I do & have met some awesome people.  It makes the less awesome idiots I do meet more tolerable.

As I said, I’ve been meeting some new people…most of them pretty awesome…but this 1 guy I met a few days ago *shakes her head* he took the cake.  He keeps insisting he’s a dominant but all he’s concerned with is the sexual side of things, trying to push me into things I’m nowhere near ready for after knowing him for less than a week & saying himself that pleasing my dominant is what matters & if I don’t then I’m just being selfish…even when it makes me disgusted with myself & the world I should still do it because I’m just being difficult & not wanting to listen to someone who’s dominant to me.  I kept telling him if he felt that it wasn’t going to work, but did keep chatting with him just ignored every time the conversation took a sexual turn & turned it some way else.

But what was the last straw was when he told me that if we ever got together, he’d make me…& my son….quit playing WoW.  I mean it’s bad enough he doesn’t listen to anything I say but then wants to take away 1 of the few things that I truly enjoy & can meet people & love doing with my kid & friends?  And is telling me how to raise my kid when he has never even met him & didn’t even bother to ask me what I thought of it?  That was the final straw.  You can try & treat me however you want but you do not try to parent my child without asking.  Especially when you have none so you’ve not had personal experience.  Not that I’m saying if you haven’t had kids you can’t be a parent, but you really shouldn’t tell someone else what to do with a kid you don’t even know & know nothing about either.

And then in WoW I had some super intelligent & kind people (note the sarcasm there) telling me & my son that we were weak & fools & to stop bragging when if we were really good we could do blah blah blah & I just said back in chat “Wow…what supportive people we have in wow” & I bet I got 5 laughs.  And when his comeback was if you want supportive quit WoW & go find some real friends I told him that I brought my real friends to WoW with me so his help honestly wasn’t needed but thanks for the thought.  I got a few laughs from that but you know what…the people who feel the same way won’t argue with the trolls so at least they know it’s not just them.  I know I shouldn’t feed the trolls but sometimes you just gotta let everyone else know that they’re not alone.

Lastly, I want to thank my Former Master for helping me take up for myself & not just accept what I get when it’s all wrong for me.  He helped me to believe in how amazing & awesome I can be, & how so many other people see just what a special person I am even when I can’t see it or believe it.  He has helped me grow & blossom in ways I don’t think even he realizes & I want to thank him for showing me how to be a good woman, a good friend, as well as a good submissive.